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Yes, I´m still here. Still kicking along, and making due the best I can. I´ve been pushing my self to the limits trying to prepare for the inevitable, but it is starting to pull me down. I´m finding it difficult to eat and even more tricky to sleep. There have been some details come to light in recent days, and I´l be doing my best to get those posted here in the next day or two. Some good, some bad. At the end of each day here, I´m still just hanging in the balance. Every day that passes is just another hurdle, and another day closer to the end of this part of my journey.
One of the most difficult things I have had to deal with lately has been the culture gap between here and the so called modern world. I have made my best efforts lately to stay in contact with people back where I spent the majority of my life, but I do find it painstaking at times. I hope that statement doesn´t offend anyone because it certainly wasn´t meant to be. After spending the last two years here, I realize how little the western world really understands the true majority of people on the planet. Just as an example, less that 6% of the world´s population speaks English as it´s first language. In contrast, about 90% of the internet´s content is in English. That is a huge gap, but one that´s easy to understand here. Only about 26% of the world has internet access. In another contrast, 42% of the worldwide internet users are in (you guessed it) Asia as opposed to the mere 14% that come from North America.
It´s just more of the same from a history point of view. Western countries have done their worst in trying to colonize, conquer, and destroy the cultures of so many others that were deemed inferior by whatever powers that might be for whatever political, financial, or religious gains. The English, Spaniards, and French from colonial days all come to mind and the effects can still be seen here, but the most recent and worst offenders have been Americans. The ¨average Joe American¨ doesn´t have a clue. Even worse yet, he probably doesn´t even care as long as he can still get the NFL game on Sunday after church, and fill up his SUV for less than 5$ a gallon. I´m not pointing any fingers here, but I just want to express the sentiments from here in on my side of the planet.
I do not consider myself to be UnAmerican, but I have certainly gained an understanding of why so many people are. Most of my fellow ¨falang¨ (foreigner) friends here are British and Australian. Whenever we encounter another American the end result is always the same. He or she eventually goes along his or her way, and the guys shake their heads in unison saying....¨freakin´ Americans.......sorry Mattie¨. My response is always the same. ¨yea yea....I know¨. I usually end up spending my time with Thai people here. Some introduce me as being ¨Thai-American¨, but I mostly get compared to my Burmese and Tai Yai friends. Burma is Thailand´s Mexico, and many people here just see me as another sorry sucker here illegaly trying to make a living. Sad, but true.
Just as a frame of reference, the Australians have a long standing slang term for us. The name is ¨Seppo¨. It´s a reference to a septic tank because they think we´re all full of ¨you know what¨. Funny, but I´ve learned to deal with it.
I suppose I am just thinking out loud, but my brain is just overloaded at the moment so it was time to put a few words down. Again, my goal is not to offend but to enlighten. Back in the states we are all brought up to be feel so self important, when in reality there is a great big world out there with cultures, languages, societies, and lifestyles that are much larger and older than our own. I used to think it was so cool when I could visit a city in the northwest US that was over 100 years old. Now, I live less than 100 yards from a fortified city wall that was built 600 years ago, and ¨recently¨ renovated about 200 years ago.
I hope all of you are well. I am trying my best to understand and communicate when we do talk, but it is difficult at times. Please bear with me. There are many things that I must refrain from talking about and I have to choose my words carefully. Sometimes it is just easier to go visit neighbors and friends and have a conversation in something other than English because they at least understand the way things work here and can give me some feedback appropriate to the circumstances.
One of the most difficult things I have had to deal with lately has been the culture gap between here and the so called modern world. I have made my best efforts lately to stay in contact with people back where I spent the majority of my life, but I do find it painstaking at times. I hope that statement doesn´t offend anyone because it certainly wasn´t meant to be. After spending the last two years here, I realize how little the western world really understands the true majority of people on the planet. Just as an example, less that 6% of the world´s population speaks English as it´s first language. In contrast, about 90% of the internet´s content is in English. That is a huge gap, but one that´s easy to understand here. Only about 26% of the world has internet access. In another contrast, 42% of the worldwide internet users are in (you guessed it) Asia as opposed to the mere 14% that come from North America.
It´s just more of the same from a history point of view. Western countries have done their worst in trying to colonize, conquer, and destroy the cultures of so many others that were deemed inferior by whatever powers that might be for whatever political, financial, or religious gains. The English, Spaniards, and French from colonial days all come to mind and the effects can still be seen here, but the most recent and worst offenders have been Americans. The ¨average Joe American¨ doesn´t have a clue. Even worse yet, he probably doesn´t even care as long as he can still get the NFL game on Sunday after church, and fill up his SUV for less than 5$ a gallon. I´m not pointing any fingers here, but I just want to express the sentiments from here in on my side of the planet.
I do not consider myself to be UnAmerican, but I have certainly gained an understanding of why so many people are. Most of my fellow ¨falang¨ (foreigner) friends here are British and Australian. Whenever we encounter another American the end result is always the same. He or she eventually goes along his or her way, and the guys shake their heads in unison saying....¨freakin´ Americans.......sorry Mattie¨. My response is always the same. ¨yea yea....I know¨. I usually end up spending my time with Thai people here. Some introduce me as being ¨Thai-American¨, but I mostly get compared to my Burmese and Tai Yai friends. Burma is Thailand´s Mexico, and many people here just see me as another sorry sucker here illegaly trying to make a living. Sad, but true.
Just as a frame of reference, the Australians have a long standing slang term for us. The name is ¨Seppo¨. It´s a reference to a septic tank because they think we´re all full of ¨you know what¨. Funny, but I´ve learned to deal with it.
I suppose I am just thinking out loud, but my brain is just overloaded at the moment so it was time to put a few words down. Again, my goal is not to offend but to enlighten. Back in the states we are all brought up to be feel so self important, when in reality there is a great big world out there with cultures, languages, societies, and lifestyles that are much larger and older than our own. I used to think it was so cool when I could visit a city in the northwest US that was over 100 years old. Now, I live less than 100 yards from a fortified city wall that was built 600 years ago, and ¨recently¨ renovated about 200 years ago.
I hope all of you are well. I am trying my best to understand and communicate when we do talk, but it is difficult at times. Please bear with me. There are many things that I must refrain from talking about and I have to choose my words carefully. Sometimes it is just easier to go visit neighbors and friends and have a conversation in something other than English because they at least understand the way things work here and can give me some feedback appropriate to the circumstances.
Take care everyone,
Matt
Great post. My feelings exactly. I don't know a lot of foreigners here, just a handful, and only one is American. He moved here over three years ago and hasn't been back. His Brooklyn accent has diminished as he speaks more Chinglish now.
ReplyDeleteHey Matt
ReplyDeleteThis too shall pass and you have a long life ahead of you, I am of the mind that everything happens for a reason. You will find happiness and grief wherever you go. I am still in New York City for two weeks and making the most of it. I biked into Harlem this morning and spent much of my time in Central Park. I saw a young couple on a park bench, they had been married that day and were in their tux and wedding dress a bouquet of flowers lay next to the bride and they were looking through their camera at moments marking the start of a new partnership. Life goes on with its joys and sorrows. I have a feeling that you will be alright, pay a fine and then have to go out of the country and return again. thailand would be diminished without you.